For our bitchiness

I have a present for you that is why I need your address, it will come in the mail in the next week or so, you will die. Only one clue: BITCH

For my desire to be a bitch and your desire to listen to me bitch

HELLO HELLO HELLO!

How is your house? How is your room? I am in love with the yellow on the, from what I hear, amazing storage space! I am at work right now, just dreaming about you as usual. How has your day been? THE BEST MAN IN THE WORLD, this professor of Jewish studies just walked by, Max Tiktin, he teaches the Yiddish class here, and also married my professor G. Wald in the Hillel center on campus (he also ordained a Rabbi)! You would love him. I wish I was with you right now, I will admit that I would prefer to be in California, soaking up the Rain (!!??!!) and driving around with you. I would even go on a run with you if it meant we would be together. There are no good people here in DC. I invited that arm-toucher from my class to my party, but the shitty flirt guy asked if he "could bring someone?" UGGG which means a girl, which sucks, particularly since I had a whole plan figured out for us. Oh well. Hopefully the San Francisco arm-toucher shows up sans woman.

So, I have to tell you about my dream I had the night before my birthday. We lived in Chicago and the only people I remember being involved in my dream are you and John Cusak, but John Cusak was Rob from High Fidelity. Anyway, him, you and I all went to dinner for my birthday along with some other people, who are stupid and don't matter. But we went to this awesome restaurant on top of this hill (Chicago seemed to me to be more like San Francisco than Chicago, but oh well). It was romantic, and me and John Cusak were like dating, what a dream man! I have realized, shitty dude he is, I am in love with him and he is the idea (looking and acting man). Kill me. Here is a stupid video from the movie, just because I love the stupid song!

For your love of long island and the semites

Here is my favorite song by Billy Joel, notice the ugly men wearing disgusting clothes from the 80's, thinking they are some sort of sex symbols. Anyway, I love you, and you inspire me like some woman is inspiring Billy.

For our bitchy future of middle parts

I can't believe how good this bitch looks, I am in love with her. I need those glasses and to walk the streets of Paris with you. Will you go to Europe with me this summer? I want to go so bad, but I only want to be there with you. Come here now, I just want to be driving around and getting lost in the West side, eating those fake chickens in Native Foods. I love you.

For your gucci boots and new best friend

I really like the end with the making out part , it is so weird. I also love the nerdy plaid and nirvana girl, besides didn't you know grunge was back? We proved it.

For your pleasure

So I spruced up the fucking blog last night, after smoking a lot and feeling a creative streak. This is a perfect resource to show you all the countless videos I watch on youtube, which I am really happy about, although with further consideration, I realize there is really nothing creative about this process. Oh well. So, having been the third wheel last night and realizing EVERY person in my house had a date, except me, I realized you are always my date, so I would dedicate this to you because it is how I feel every moment:



Also, this is like a mix tape for the 21st century. EW I can't believe I just said that! I love you.

For past times remembered

I think you will like this one:

For our recent decision to go internet-community free

I love you. I wish you were here. In reference to your facts, one, why are there stupid bugs out now, HELLO its the fucking winter. Two, I wish you were right now, I am in bed,eating soul veg mac n' cheese in bed, and listening to this letters to cleo song, and three, I was thinking about pringles today and how I was craving them this morning when I woke up a wreck. Also, HELLO the fucking queen goddess bitch is killing me, i tried to do the poof-beehive thing but it looks a bit weird- she is fabulous, particularly in that movie. Okay, look at this:



I had to post something from it for you too! Okay. I love you. More to come tomorrow!

For your franco-femme-phonic behavior

For Beth

This is my dedication of love to my Bethany. We are cosmic twins, embryos from space forced to meet by the cosmic magnetism of our love. We are a rare breed who unconditionally feel the connection forged in the cosmos. It was hot that fateful day in October of 1998 when I met the beautiful Bethany in P.E. class in the Foothills of Southern California. I love you.